... Trouble is, I'm not sure that I even believe in a soul.
I recently entered a branch near my school armed with two coupons, hopeful that I could use at least one of them, if not both. I know how banks work, I thought. They want more accounts, and if you bitch loud enough, they'll let you double up on the promotional offers.
That, at least, had been my experience from the other side of the tellers' counter during the 18 months I worked part-time as a bank teller in Connecticut.
There are a couple problems with this strategy. First, I do not really know how to bitch in order to get my way. Second, even if I did know how to bitch at a complete stranger, I apparently do not have enough money for Chase Bank to really give a shit whether I keep it with them or some other chump bank.
I sat down with a plump older woman who spoke with a vaguely Caribbean accent and who explained that Chase checking accounts currently charge a monthly service fee of $6, but they were soon phasing that out in favor of a checking account that would charge a $12 monthly service fee, unless you either had a direct deposit totaling $500 or more or maintained a balance of at least $1,500. In your checking account.
I really only wanted to open the account so that (a) I could use an ATM somewhere in the city without incurring a $2 - $3 fee and (b) I could possibly earn an extra $100.
No luck on either count.
I suppose I will have to stick with my original strategy of using Rite-Aid as my own personal ATM, the only trouble there being that I can only use so much mouthwash in one week.
